A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.Steven Wright
Babies don't need a vacation, but I still see them at the beach... it pisses me off! I'll go over to a little baby and say 'What are you doing here? You haven't worked a day in your life!'Steven Wright
Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.Steven Wright
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.Steven Wright
For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.Steven Wright
How young can you die of old age?Steven Wright
I bought some batteries, but they weren't included.Steven Wright
I bought some instant water one time but I didn't know what to add to it.Steven Wright
I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five.Steven Wright
I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car.Steven Wright
I had to stop driving my car for a while... the tires got dizzy.Steven Wright
I have an answering machine in my car. It says, I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out.Steven Wright
I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone.Steven Wright
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.Steven Wright
I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window.Steven Wright
I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.Steven Wright
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.Steven Wright
I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'Steven Wright
I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving.Steven Wright
I saw a bank that said '24 Hour Banking,' but I don't have that much time.Steven Wright
I think God's going to come down and pull civilization over for speeding.Steven Wright
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.Steven Wright
I was a peripheral visionary. I could see the future, but only way off to the side.Steven Wright
I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.Steven Wright
I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.Steven Wright
I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, 'What for?' I said, 'I'm going to buy some sugar.'Steven Wright
I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.Steven Wright
If God dropped acid, would he see people?Steven Wright
My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere.Steven Wright
Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.Steven Wright
There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators.Steven Wright
What's another word for Thesaurus?Steven Wright
When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.Steven Wright
When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'Steven Wright
is a famous American comedian and actor,
who was born on
December 6, 1955. As a person born on this date, Steven Wright is listed in our database as the 17th
most popular celebrity for the day (December 6) and the 77th most popular for the year (1955).
People born on December 6
fall under the Zodiac sign of Sagittarius, the Archer.
Steven Wright is the 614th most popular Sagittarius.
Aside from information specific to Steven Wright's birthday, Steven Wright is the 4096th most famous American and ranks 18th in famous people born in Cambridge, Massachusetts, U.S.
In general, Steven Wright ranks as the 7534th
most popular famous person, and the 119th most popular comedian of all time.
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